Wednesday, May 27, 2009

From the Doctor's Office: Crunchdown


Mainstream is a word that only describes a select few games. Games that make the front page get lots of traffic and games with badges get even more. I do realize that not every game can get badges for this or that reason but that doesn't mean that we, as a big, loving, gaming family can't try games that aren't typically "Mainstream". If we don't play and love these games without badges, who else will? It's up to us to rescue and repsect these games without badges. In turn, they'll teach us to enjoy the ride, without gratification at the end. Now, before I get too philosophical here, I think it's a good time to point out that this game has more cussing and violence than you can shake a stick at. It's also got a few minor bugs and glitches and grammar/spelling errors that'll make your spell checker cringe. But that makes it charming and funny. The main premise of Crunchdown (By I_Smell) is to take down the mind control device causing people everywhere to kill each other in riots. You'll take it out by any means necessary, which will involve fighting and a great power up system where you eat environmental objects to get a power. This is similar to the Kirby Franchise, and yet is fresh and new.

Gameplay: 4.5/5 I'm sure everyone has played a simple beat-em-up game at some point in time. You've got your basic fighting moves by mashing buttons. At the same time, though, Crunchdown offers weapons and interactive scenery. See that beer bottle on the ground? You can pick it up and break it over your enemy's head for extra damage. For a flash game, I was really impressed at the variety of power ups in the game as well. You'll be eating everything from Fire Hydrants and Potted Plants to Dumbells and Mops. There are some minor issues when it comes to enemies however. I'd get a little frustrated when one of them became glitched behind a wall or off screen and I couldn't move on without killing him. You'll have to restart the section over, but since the game has a decent replay factor (trying to eat different items) you most likely won't mind playing a section or boss over again. There's also a small section in the game that needs to be noted: The Truck Scene. You'll take control of a truck and minigun and flee a semi that's firing lazer mounted on the cab. It's completely different and is a great change of gameplay.

Visual: 4/5 Crunchdown has the smoothest animations I've seen in a while. Punching and using powers are very silky and just look great visually. The enemies are very simply drawn, but this gives the game that cartoony aspect that one would expect from something so funny. There's a great variety of enemies (All of whom have very funny names), but the one that sticks out to me the most is the fighting hobo that stumbles out of the dumpster near the end of Act 1. The backgrounds and actual places where the fighting take place aren't bad looking either. The Gym was probably my favourite place to duke it out. Eating treadmills has never been so much fun.

Audio: 4/5 Fresh tunes from the Newgrounds database of music. It's great to see musich that really has a lot of time and effort poured into it. They always do a great job and Crunchdown's soundtrack won't disappoint. If you're perhaps in the mood for Elevator Music while killing people, feel free to mute the game. It's got the option to which is always a plus. As for sound effects, there's a decent varietey, though when you find yourself hitting someone broad side the head with a wood baseball bat, you'd expect a more dull *thock*-ing noise. Instead, all the weapons make this metal clanging sound that just seems out of place. Other than that, I had my sound way up for this game.

Difficulty: 4/5 When you first start Crunchdown, you'll get the option to choose how many lives you're awarded, thus making the game more difficult. The game also has achievements, which are challenging as well. It's great to try and get them all to see the rewards in the pause menu. I can't seem to get the Hat reward to work, though. Maybe it's just me. Since enemies will spawn all around you, you'll have to move quickly and pick which targets to fight. Or maybe you can flee the fray to get a new power. It's different every time, making for a great difficulty.

Overall: 4.5/5 This game is impressive. There are two things to keep in mind when playing it, however: First, the dialogue is ridiculously vulgar. Which is funny if you're in the mood for that. Secondly, expect some minor glitches and a little frustration. Since the game is relatively short, you'll have fun restarting a section. I know I did.

Ah, I guess I can add a third and final thing, as sort of a thesis to this post. Don't be afraid to try a game that doesn't have badges. You'll miss out on gems like this. Knightfall (Another personal fave of mine) is the same way. You'll see that real creativity can come in simple, underrated packages.

~DoctorAutopsy

Kong Rating: 3.50

16 comments:

逆円助 said...

さあ、今夏も新たな出会いを経験してみませんか?当サイトは円助交際の逆、つまり女性が男性を円助する『逆円助交際』を提供します。逆円交際を未経験の方でも気軽に遊べる大人のマッチングシステムです。年齢上限・容姿・経験一切問いません。男性の方は無料で登録して頂けます。貴方も新たな出会いを経験してみませんか

精神年齢 said...

みんなの精神年齢を測定できる、メンタル年齢チェッカーで秘められた年齢がズバリわかっちゃう!かわいいあの子も実は精神年齢オバサンということも…合コンや話のネタに一度チャレンジしてみよう

家出 said...

最近TVや雑誌で紹介されている家出掲示板では、全国各地のネットカフェ等を泊り歩いている家出娘のメッセージが多数書き込みされています。彼女たちはお金がないので掲示板で知り合った男性の家にでもすぐに泊まりに行くようです。あなたも書き込みに返事を返してみませんか

動物占い said...

あなたの性格を、動物に例えて占っちゃいます。もしかしたらこんな動物かも!?動物占いをうまく使って、楽しい人間関係を築いてください

家出 said...

家出中の女性や泊まる所が無い女性達がネットカフェなどで、飲み放題のドリンクで空腹を満たす生活を送っています。当サイトはそんな女性達をサポートしたいという人たちと困っている女性たちの為のサイトです

セレブラブ said...

セレブ女性との割り切りお付き合いで大金を稼いでみませんか?女性に癒しと快楽、男性に謝礼とお互い満たしあえる当サイト、セレブラブはあなたの登録をお待ちしております。

夏フェス!! said...

夏フェス一緒に行ってくれる人募集!!夏の思い出一緒につくろぉ☆ megumi-0830@docomo.ne.jp 連絡してね♪

無料ゲーム said...

あなたのゲーマー度を無料ゲーム感覚で測定します。15個の質問に答えるだけの簡単測定で一度遊んでみませんか?ゲームが得意な人もそうでない人もぜひどうぞ。

素人 said...

Hな女性たちは素人ホストを自宅やホテルに呼び、ひとときの癒しを求めていらっしゃいます。当サイトでは男性ホスト様の人員が不足しており、一日3~4人の女性の相手をするホストもおられます。興味を持たれた方は当サイトにぜひお越しください

出会い系 said...

実は出会い系には…関係者用入り口があるのを知っていますか?広告主やスポンサー用に用意されたIDではサクラや業者が立ち入ることが出来ないようになっているのです。当サイトでは極秘に入手した関係者用URLが公開されています

逆援助 said...

男性はお金、女性は快楽を得る逆援助に興味はありませんか?お金を払っても性的欲求を満たしたいセレブ達との割り切り1日のお付き合いで当サイトでは大金を得ることができます。無料登録なのでアルバイト感覚でOK、詳しくはTOPページでどうぞ。

友達募集 said...

ホムペ完成記念!私の事みんなに知ってもらいたくて頑張りましたぁ。色々とご感想をお待ちしているので思った事を意見してください。メアドはほむぺにのせてありますぅ!★ fan.jna@docomo.ne.jp

家出 said...

夏休みで気軽に家出する女子○生が急増しています。しかし家出したはいいものの泊る所やお金が無い彼女たちは、掲示板などで泊めてくれる男性を探す子も多いようです。当掲示板にも夏休みに入ってから通常の3倍以上のメッセージが寄せられています

人妻 said...

今最もアツイバイトは人妻とのセフレ契約です。当サイトではお金を払ってでもセフレがほしい人妻が集まり、男性会員様との逆援生活を待っています。当サイトで欲求不満の女性との出会いをしてみませんか

素人 said...

素人ホストでは、男性のテクニック次第で女性会員様から高額な謝礼がもらえます。欲求不満な人妻や、男性と出会いが無い女性達が当サイトで男性を求めていらっしゃいます。興味のある方はTOPページからどうぞ

友達募集中 said...

少し魅惑な自分をネットだから公開してみました。普段言えない事など、思い切って告白しているプロフなので興味ある方はぜひ除いてみてください連絡待ってまぁす。 hinyaaaaa@docomo.ne.jp